I was sitting in the passenger seat the other day with my newly "permitted" 15 year-old daughter doing the driving. She guided our battleship-sized, eight-passenger station wagon, affectionately known as the Stat Wag, into a parking space in front of the Lodge at THE WILDS. (Actually, we pulled in, backed up, pulled in again, backed up again and pulled in again. But it was done very safely!) One of the couples attending a family camp was watching the maneuvering, and they walked over with knowing smiles on their faces. "We've been through this process a number of times!" said the man. She queried, "Is this your first?" I told them that she was actually my fourth driver-in-training to go through the process but my first girl. This, of course, led to a great 15-minute conversation complete with assorted "war stories."

This process to which we are referring is the whole driver's education, driver's permit and driver's license examination "thing." Do I have any sage advice for any of you starting the process with your children? I have tons of advice, but it sounds pretty silly when I try to repeat it to another adult. I do have one saying of which I am very proud! Early on in the process, I say this to each child, "Remember, the important thing is not that you be comfortable when you are driving; the important thing is that I be comfortable when you are driving!" On that philosophical note, I usually leave them alone, puzzled, wondering "whatever in the world does he mean?" Here, however, are four things for every parent to remember as they are buckling up for another adventure in the brave world of new teenaged, beginning drivers!

#1 Keep your smile - First, and foremost, keep you smile! Your child will look over at you as you are pinned and frozen in the passenger seat. Good parenting requires you to have this pre-formed, pre-stressed smile on your face. It is a parent's smile of confidence! It is a smile that says, "I know you can do this!" It is a smile that says, "I have the utmost confidence in the many hours you spent with the instructor who has a brake on his side of the car. I know I won't need such equipment because you are so thoroughly trained!" (So why is there an indented place in the passenger side floorboard?) It is a smile that says, "I pray this will be over with soon!" It is a smile that supposedly restores calm to an anxious son or daughter who just accelerated through an intersection. ("But, Dad, I didn't even see the STOP sign!") It is a smile that will probably never leave your face! It will be frozen there permanently. It will be there when your wife (or husband) asks you about it at bedtime! It will be there when you brush your teeth and drink your coffee in the morning. Years from now, the undertaker will not know how to wipe it off! Never lose that confident smile…no matter what your brain is screaming!

#2 Try to forget some things - When you look at your daughter gripping the steering wheel so confidently and commandingly, try to forget that she still sleeps with her favorite stuffed animal! Forget that this same son who is presently in control of 1 1/2 tons of fast-moving metal did, on at least two separate occasions, pilot his bike directly into a pole and a holly bush because he was not paying attention. Forget that this same child only one year before managed to jam every bumper car at Andy's Amusement Park into one single corner and that the old man who operates the ride had "never seen anything like it in his 16 years at the park!" Try to forget that if your child has a fender bender, your insurance payments will roughly be the same as the Gross National Product of several newly formed European nations! Just forget some things and enjoy the bonding experience!

#3 Try to remember some things - Try to remember that you will probably look back and laugh at the whole experience…some day! This will be a lasting memory that both you and your child will have together and will bring up time and time again. If the Lord wills and you should live long, you may even get to tell your grandchildren how bad a driver their mom or dad was! That is worth big points with grandchildren, I understand! Try to remember that you come from a long line of parent heroes who have seen their duty and done it! You are one of the few, the proud, the panicky, the parents of children who are in the process!

#4 On a more serious note! Why are we so passionate when we are helping our children learn to drive? We know it is important to their future! We know it has life and death implications! We are right alongside them teaching them lessons, relating our experiences, issuing our warnings and giving encouragement when we can. We try to be good examples to follow when we drive. We come close to being "nags"! We are passionate about what we tell them. We leave no doubt as to what we think is good driving and what we think is bad driving. We are willing to spend great portions of time making sure they "get it right". Even when they get the license, we do not stop with the constant commentary! We are teaching them as if their lives depend on it…and they do!

Do we have the same urgency about our desire to teach them the benefits of living their lives loving, trusting, knowing and obeying God? Some things are natural because we practice them so much! Driving is natural, and we know the lessons we want to teach. Do we naturally and practically teach them the skills they need to know in order to put the Lord in the absolute center of their lives? Do we have example after example of the excitement we have experienced knowing and trusting God in our lives?

Most of us believe our driving skills are decent. Are we decent at teaching the skills our children need to know our God? It is never too late to learn a skill like driving. It is also never too late to get back to the priority of making Christ the most important One in our lives! Which do we feel more competent teaching our children, driving or trusting God? How to know and love God is the most important skill we can pass along to our children! To the ones who come after us, it is the most serious matter of all! It is the real process!